On Change – When puzzle pieces seem to be missing and your life doesn’t make sense to you

On Change: When puzzle pieces seem to be missing and your life doesn’t make sense to you

We all want change, to be a better version of ourselves. In theory. If only change didn’t feel so scary and if it wasn’t such hard work….

But, in reality, the process of change is hard …

The past year I’ve been waiting for the puzzle pieces to drop into place. I kept asking: “What do I want to do with my life?” (way too big a question btw). “What am I good at?” “What do I want?” Rinse and Repeat.

As an answer, like an automatic record, I kept repeating my old dreams and goals, because they feel familiar and safe.

The brain loves familiarity after all.

Everything that’s new, all change, is unfamiliar, scary AF, and therefore undesirable to your mind.

I was so stuck on auto-pilot that I hadn’t noticed that how I felt about those old goals had changed. I was blind to my truth that, in my heart, I wanted something way different.

I am someone who is good at motivating people (although I still cringe when I say it. It feels arrogant – but that is a whole other discussion for another time).

 What I would love to do is help you purpose driven chicas to inspire you to make your dreams come true, to help you be unf*ckwithable when you share your truth with the world.

But whenever this change of heart did come up for me, I pushed it away as:

  • impossible
  • unrealistic
  • … it is so different than what I saw myself doing for all these years: research, a PhD, … becoming a freelance writer.
    … I am so used to keeping myself small, and this feels so big that it’s scary.
    … the word coach suggests specific associations that don’t fit me that well – like being a good listener – I get stuck in the semantics.
  • I don’t even know how?!
Pfff, the mountain of change seems so high! … it seems easier just to keep life as is.

Change is hard, and for a while, it was just easier to keep on searching for what I wanted to do with my life. 

But sometimes we make it harder than it really needs to be.

Instead of trusting the process, we start by asking oursleves, but how?

Change becomes easier, when you trust the process

All I really need to know is that my superpower is motivation, and I don’t have to push or direct or shape this in any way. It comes naturally.

I need to put away all the self-help books and stop answering the questions and to trust the process – to trust myself and just go for it. Because the puzzle pieces HAVE fallen into place. Only, I’m not allowing myself to accept this change.

Your path doesn’t have to be perfect.

If I just give myself permission to continue doing what I’ve been doing – writing blogs and building my business – the answer will come. I will grow each and every day into the person I need to be to make things happen.

So lately, I’ve been exploring the possibilities, and I feel alive again! Everything is open, and the possibilities are endless.

Now I wanna ask you… where have you been holding on to old habits and expectations? How are you holding yourself back?

What are you good at and what gives you energy? Answer that from the heart.

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